150+ Crocodile Puns: Jokes And One-Liners

Enjoy a first-class collection of funny alligator and crocodile puns for the whole family. No Crocs here just laughs!

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready to embark on a wild and hilarious adventure through the snappy world of crocodile puns! These puns will have you rolling in laughter faster than a croc can chomp down on its lunch. So, brace yourself for a tidal wave of reptilian humor as we explore the depths of crocodile jokes, one-liners, and funny lines that will leave you grinning from ear to ear.

Crocodile puns are no croc of nonsense – they’re the real deal when it comes to tickling your funny bone. Whether you’re a fan of these toothy creatures or just looking for a laugh, we’ve got you covered with a mighty collection of crocodile-themed puns that will make your friends go “Crikey!”

Why did the crocodile go to the dentist? It needed a “scale” and polish! And have you heard about the crocodile who became a rock star? He had a killer “reptile” on stage! These puns are just a taste of the snappy humor waiting to snap you out of your boredom.

So, get ready to dive into a pool of laughter and unleash your inner pun-master as we embark on this hilarious crocodile-filled adventure! And remember, stay sharp and keep those puns rolling!

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Top Ten Crocodile Puns

Crocodile Puns
  • “When I told my friend about my job as a baker, he exclaimed “Wow! Really knead that dough!”
  • My friend agreed, saying he wanted to hear a joke about paper and leafing it up to us both to decide.
  • My computer told me I needed a break, and its response was, “Use Control+Alt+Del to solve your issues!”
  • Who are the people who love the crocodile? Crocophiles.
  • My friend asked whether my new thesaurus would meet his high standards; to which I replied in the affirmative. “No. This book stands apart!”
  • What is an alligator that is dressed in an outfit? An investigator.
  • I love you. You are my life.
  • My friend seemed pretty intrigued that I’d seen a documentary on beavers. His response: “Dam, that sounds interesting!”
  • What’s an alligator that has GPS? An navigator.
  • Did you know about the law company with the most terrifying lawyers? It’s full of gators.

Read More: Funny Reptile Puns And One-Liners

Best Crocodile Puns

  • If you need to know directions, you can call to request a navigation-gator.
  • If you’re in need of a solution to a mystery you can call an in-vestigator.
  • The life span of alligators is as long as 100 years. That’s why they have an increase chance that they’ll see you in the future.
  • Alligators live for as long as 50 years old, this is why there’s the chance that they’ll see you again.
  • There are some who like playing Croc-quet.
  • Did you know about the incessant croc-calling of the Frog? The croc just called the frog.
  • What is an agator who works in the courthouse? The word ” litigator” is used to describe.
  • What happens when the alligator is crossed flowers? I’m not sure what it is, but I’m certainly not going to get a whiff of it.
  • Have you noticed the gators on skateboards? they’re fantastic alli-skaters.
  • What is the reason why crocodiles in Egypt who drinkers do not get better? They are stuck in Niel. 20.Did you know about the constipated Crocodile? It was the rockashit.
  • As soon as I told a close friend about starting work at the bakery, he inquired, asking: Are you making enough dough?”
  • I suggested to my wife that she accept her mistakes. When I said this she hugged me.
  • You’re a really talented musician. You ought to be part of an punk-croc band.
  • Have you heard about the crocodile incapable of mating? The reptile had a problem.
  • What is the reason alligators are long and green? They are because if they were smaller and red, they’d be tomato-like.
  • What’s the distinction between the alligator as well as a crocodile? The latter will be with you in the future while the other will be with you after a few minutes.
  • Which came first: the alligator or the Crocodile? The dinosaur.
  • What’s an alligator working in farms? An irri-gator.
  • What is an SWAT group of alligators? Gator-raid.
  • My friend told me the key to successfully catching squirrels was having all the right nuts and bolts at his disposal.
  • What kind of flooring are alligators using inside their houses? Rep-tiles.
  • I asked my friend whether he excels in mathematics. His response? Quite average – mean, mode and median only!
  • I asked my friend if he wanted to play hide-and-seek and was met with his response of: “No thanks; I’m too busy!”
  • What is an alligator that wears Crocs? An all-sold-out.
  • I accidentally inhaled several Scrabble tiles and could face serious trouble upon going into my next bathroom visit!
  • Alligators can reach 15 feet. The majority of them grow only 4 of them however.
  • What is an alligator, that comes up to you and bites from behind? A tail-gator.
  • My friend became very intrigued with what I had read on antigravity and commented, stating, “Well, it keeps holding onto me!”.
  • I asked the baker if he could create me some bread that looked just like me and he said yes, no problem-I can do a loaf-likeme!”
  • My friend seemed fascinated when I told him I saw a documentary on beavers, saying: “That sounds interesting!”.
  • What happens to alligators who give them presents during Christmas? Santa Jaws.
  • What is an alligator that loves irrigation of his plants? An irrigator.
  • Why has my tomato turned red? Because it saw salad dressing!
  • “Well,” my wife exclaimed when I reported seeing someone steal our couch: “That is sofa crime!”
  • I contacted the bakery to see if they carried any roll models; unfortunately they only carried bread winners!
  • What drink do alligators consume prior to the race? Gator-ade.
  • If alligators are in need of energy They just drink some Gator-ade.
  • Let’s go for a game of scrabble. I’m just looking for the croc-a tiles.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
  • I asked my friend if he wanted to play hide-and-seek and his response was, “Not now; I’m awfully busy!”
  • Why don’t skeletons fight each other? Because they lack the guts!
  • What about the chic female crocodile? She’s every inch a fashion-forward frock-odile.
  • My absolute favorite song is from Spandau Croc-quet.
  • What’s an animal that is employed in a farm? An irri-gator.
  • The Crocodile Hunter’s “Steve Irwin” family has sued an Australian sunscreen firm. Its sunscreen didn’t shield him from damaging radiation.
  • What is an alligator that is carrying the compasses? The navigator.
  • A crocodile, a stingray as well as a snake that is poisonous walk into the bar. It’s not an accident, this is a typical day in Australia.
  • My friend did not seem too sure, saying something like, he wasn’t sure yet as to his camping plans but being rather “tentative!”.
  • Alligators are able to live for at least 100 years… That’s reason enough to believe that they’ll see your face later.
  • After a young girl saw an alligator in a depressing state in the zoo, she approached him and asked, “Hey, are you cai-man?”

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Funny Puns About Crocodile

  • How does an alligator change when he rides on a vessel? It becomes an experienced navigator.
  • Why don’t crocodiles target lawyers? Professionalism!
  • I have a rash when I wear polo shirts featuring tiny crocodiles. I am lacoste intolerant.
  • Did you know about the gator who later turned into a Muslim? It was Allah Gator.
  • What’s more terrifying than a hungry crocodile? Two crocodiles are coming for dinner.
  • This alligator was a great photographer He was also a bit of snapper.
  • My friend explained his method for catching squirrels by telling me, “All it takes are the appropriate nuts and bolts!”
  • I instructed the other alligators to go outside. He did not cai-man.
  • The crocodile attempted to imitate the behavior of a rooster in order to wake up his friends in the morning. the crocodile went croc-adoodle-doodle-do.
  • Have you heard about the scientist who attempted to invent an air sucking vacuum but couldn’t get its suction right? He certainly tried!
  • The gators are very curious and would make excellent interri-gators.
  • What would you name an alligator wearing Crocs at his feet? A traitor.
  • What’s the most efficient method of cooking an Crocodile? In a croc pot.
  • What’s the proper name for an alligator friend of yours? A pal-igator.
  • I visited the zoo and saw an alligator which can only consume very finely chopped food. It was an alligator.
  • Why can’t crocodiles eat fast meals? They can’t get it!
  • What’s the difference between dog and Gator? Dogs’ bark can be more damaging than the bite of a gator.
  • Man walks into the bar and sees an alligator. He inquires of the bartender “Do you have lawyers at this place?” The bartender responds, “Yes, of course.” The patron says “Great and I’ll get an alcoholic drink for myself as well as an attorney to protect the alligator I have.”
  • My friend told me he has plenty of great pirate jokes! To my amazement he responded “Arrr, Matey! I have them by the bucketful!”
  • My friend told me he thought my decision to start meditation would be risky; his reply? – “Oh no!”. He warned, warning his audience against being subject to any “zen”iuss!
  • My friend responded in the affirmative when I inquired whether he knew any good pirate jokes: he replied with, “Arrr matey! My treasure chest’s full!”
  • My friend asked what temperature it would be. To which I replied “Unbearably hot!.”
  • What’s the most popular dip for an alligator? Croc-amole.
  • Have you heard about the rooster and croc with a baby? The story was crocadoodledoo.
  • “Well don’t worry; gravity’s got us all!” was my response when I told my friend I’m trying to lose weight.
  • If a crocodile doesn’t admit that he’s wrong, then it must be de-niled.
  • What is an animal that continues to violate the laws? A crookadile.
  • If gators stole the entire food supply, we’ll find the crook-adile.
  • What is the reason that alligators don’t watch films? They live in swamps.
  • What is a stealthy alligator? Crook-adile.
  • My friend recently asked how I manage stress. To which, my answer was that “I just hit it hard in the face and tell it where to go!”
  • If an alligator is in a stream and is convinced that he’s a crocodile an excellent chance that he’s da-nile!
  • Egyptians affirm that there are no crocodiles living in Egypt. They’re probably in the Nile.
  • How many arms does an alligator had? It’s based on how far the alligator has eaten the food he has eaten.
  • It’s just a bunch of croc and roll.
  • My friend asked if I wanted to hear some construction jokes, and he replied by claiming he wasn’t finished yet! I suggested they work on creating their own.
  • My friend asked if my new thesaurus was any good; my answer: It definitely exceeded expectations and went beyond ordinary, average or standard standards!
  • What is an alligator, who steals your attention and bites you in the back? A tail-gater.
  • Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they comprise every substance!
  • My friend asked why I chose the name Five Miles for my dog and I replied by explaining I walk five miles every day! He seemed amazed.
  • If you’re in need of sharing your list of things to be done you can be a delegator.
  • Have you heard about the person they dubbed “King of The Wild Frontier’? The name of the guy was Davy Crockett.
  • What’s an alligator who has all the gators of the same time crammed all around it? Congregator.
  • What’s an alligator, who’s always making problems? An instigator.
  • I called up the bakery and inquired as to if they carried “roll” models; unfortunately they only carried bread winners!
  • Have you heard about the croc who had an addiction to marijuana? It was an octopus.
  • What happens If you place an alligator into a blender? Gatorade.
  • My friend heard I intended to learn piano and exclaimed with delight “That sounds key-rific! That seems fantastic!”
  • Last night I attended a seafood disco and pulled one mussel out.
  • Did you know that alligators can attain 18-foot heights? However, most have only four feet!

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Best Crocodile Jokes And One-Liners

  • What’s an alligator, who eliminates insects all day? The fumigator.
  • Dream: “I dreamed I was a muffler… then was completely exhausted when waking up!”
  • Recently I visited a zoo that only contained one animal: an adorable Shih Tzu dog! Unfortunately there wasn’t anything else there except this single pup to look at and pet!
  • My dentist advised that I get a crown. At that moment I thought to myself: ‘Haven’t I always dreamt of becoming royalty?”.
  • Have you heard about the crocodile group who performed songs parodies? They were pun croc group.
  • What’s the crocodile who likes to drink? A alley-gator!
  • My friend asked what temperature it would be outside; my response: it is unbearably hot!
  • My friend asked why I named my dog Five Miles; my answer? Because we walk five miles every day!
  • Yesterday night I attended a seafood disco and successfully pulled one mussel!
  • What’s an alligator wearing an armored vest? An investigator!
  • What’s the proper name for an alligator working in a restaurant? A deli-gator.
  • Do you know who presents crocodiles with gifts during the day of Christmas? Santa Jaws!
  • What is the reason you should never play the game of poker using an alligator? The odds are always against you.
  • My friend accepted, saying it would only add humor. As soon as a joke about construction came up he smiled knowingly: “Sure – let’s build up to it!”
  • What is the drink of dehydrated alligators? Gatorade.
  • What’s an alligator inside an outfit? A invest-gator.
  • Did you know that alligators are able to reach 15 feet in length? However, most have only 4.
  • My friend found out I am reading a book on anti-gravity fascinating; his response: “Well, it must be an extremely weighty topic!”
  • My friend told me I should get my hair cut. His advice? To avoid splitting ends he suggested cutting it not too short!
  • My friend keeps telling me I’m an ineffective driver; however, this argument just won’t go anywhere!
  • What is the difference between an alligator and an Crocodile? Alligators are likely to return and crocodiles after a time.
  • I purchased some shoes from a drug dealer; unfortunately I do not know what laced them! All day I have been experiencing severe dizziness!
  • Why did the bicycle topple over? Because of two tires!
  • The temperature is getting colder. I’m craving warm crocs-o-late.

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Hey, I am Chetan Kumar owner of Punss.com. I made this site to add humor to your life. I love to laugh and I am pretty sure you do too. So let's share some jokes, puns and funny nicknames. Let's make each second joyful.