100+ Date Puns: Jokes And One-Liners

Discover witty date puns for a good laugh and love. Funny one-liners and clever jokes to lighten the mood.

Date Puns is an unpredictable world full of laughter that provides relief in dating’s challenging landscape through humor. Our charming date jokes spice up everyday conversations so they never need be nerve-racking; from fun one-liners and hilarious funny date lines to one-liners guaranteed to create shared laughs and unforgettable memories, we are here for your needs in creating shared laughs and lasting memories with one partner or many. Get ready for an hilarious roller-coaster ride full of the funniest date puns available, unleash your inner comedian, and use these puns light up date nights – ready, set, pun!

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Funny Date Puns

Date Puns
  • Why did my date pay the bill? Simply because he or she had the dough…you know…the “pita” dough!
  • Why was my date uncomfortable at a party? He or she had pit stains!
  • Dates are experts at using technology. They always know the “date-a” transfer!
  • What do you call an irresistibly sticky date fruit that always seems to cause problems? A “date-ger!”
  • What do you call an irritating date fruit that keeps getting into mischief? A date-ger!
  • What would you call a fruit that spends all its time reading books? A date-millionaire!
  • Dates are invaluable allies on your search for love! They always go the extra mile to ensure it happens for both of them!
  • Why did the date visit a doctor? Because she wasn’t feeling well and wanted to get evaluated!
  • What do you call an ever-late date fruit? A date-line!
  • Why was my date successful? Because we avoided any potential disaster!
  • What job do dates prefer most often? Pit Boss on a construction site!
  • What would a tragic date fruit say in response? “Oh no! My despair has overcome me!”
  • Why did the date secure employment at a bakery? She desired making some deliciously “sweet” dough!
  • What did the date fruit say at the awards show? My life was hell!
  • Why don’t more couples go skydiving together? Fear of potential hazards is likely the culprit!
  • How did a date fruit lip-sync in the competition? It was an incredible rendition of Pit-ney Spears!
  • What can we call a date fruit which always seems to lose its keys? A date-ger!
  • What do you call an intermittent date fruit that always arrives late? A date-line!
  • What do you call someone who can dance like no one else? A “smooth mover”.
  • Dates can serve as invaluable protectors. They know all about “date-savers.”
  • What can you call an overly hip date? A smooth operator!
  • Why did my date refuse to board the plane? They feared jet lag!
  • What did the date say to the walnut? “You make my day!”
  • What do you call a date fruit that constantly loses its keys? A date-ger!
  • Dates have some great pickup lines: “Are you a calendar? Because I can’t forget you!”
  • What movie would your date enjoy watching most often? “Jurassic Pits!”
  • What distinguishes date fruit and tomato from each other? A tomato turns red when fully ripened while date fruit can reach full maturity when they turn brown.
  • Dates always understand their priorities properly, understanding all aspects of life as an adventure to be experienced and enjoyed.
  • Dates are an effective way of combatting depression; they provide the original “happy meal.”
  • What differentiates date fruits and peaches? Peaches tend to have fuzzy exteriors while date fruits typically feature smooth surface textures.

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Funny Date Jokes

  • Dates are known for keeping their cool; they’re the epitome of fruit cool.
  • Dates will never go out of style! They are truly timeless!
  • Why did my date and fig part ways? Their relationship had too many questionable qualities for either party involved to remain stable enough for long.
  • What do you call a date fruit that always seems to tell jokes? A pun-date fruit!
  • What band would your date enjoy listening to? ‘The Rolling Stones!’
  • What song are dates fond of listening to? “I Just Called to Say I Love You! “
  • Why did he go to a comedy club? In order to “test out” its humor!
  • What do you call a nervous date? A nervous panter!
  • What do you call an ever-late date fruit? A “date-line!”
  • Why don’t dates get into arguments? They prefer an enjoyable date experience!
  • What differentiates date fruit from banana? A banana turns yellow when fully ripened while date fruits reach maturity when their skins have turned brown.
  • Why did the date fruit visit its doctor? Because it wasn’t feeling great!
  • Why did the date visit a music festival? She wanted to enjoy herself with its “date”.
  • What would you call a date fruit that’s always making jokes? A pun-date fruit!
  • Why shouldn’t dates play poker? After all, they already possess a pit-face!
  • Why did he bring a backpack with snacks for us at this party? He wanted us to snack!
  • What can you call a date fruit that constantly reads books? A date-millionaire!
  • What game are dates’ favorite to play on dates? Pit-chess!
  • Dates never seem to get lost: they possess an impeccable sense of “date-rection.”
  • What do you call an incorrigible date fruit that constantly causes mischief? A date-ger!
  • Dates who like to meditate often look forward to finding their inner “date” peace!
  • Dates are one of the best fruit pun makers around! Their puns make the “date-masters” proud!
  • What makes dates ideal as detectives? Because they always get right down to the core of an issue!
  • What do you call an overly curious date fruit that always causes trouble? A date-ger!
  • Why don’t couples play hide and seek? Because they fear they’ll end up “date-smashed!”
  • What song would your ideal date play on their iPod? “Hit me with your best pit!”
  • Dates pair well with almonds because both species love them!
  • What do you call someone who enjoys gossiping on dates? A Pit-ter patter!
  • Dates love wordplay; they love coming up with amusing puns about dating!
  • What do egotistical dates typically say about themselves? “I’m horrible!”

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Funny Date One-liners

  • Why was the date fruit known as the class clown? Because it always caused havoc!
  • Favorite sport of your significant other? Pit-ball!
  • What would you call someone with impeccable fashion taste who also happens to date trendy people? A “trendy date”.
  • Why did the date bring a map with them when visiting an orchard? Because she didn’t want to become disoriented!
  • Date’s favorite action movie? “Pits of Fury!”
  • What would you call a date fruit that constantly reads books? A date-millionaire!
  • What do you call a date fruit that always arrives late? A date-line!
  • What could possibly be worse about date fruit than its skins?
  • What do people wear to swimming classes? A pit-kini!
  • What would you call an argumentative date fruit that constantly causes problems? A “date-mean!”
  • “When I asked my date out on a dance, they declined because they said, ‘Sorry! I have already booked!”
  • Why did my date bring a ladder to the party? She heard there would be drinks up high!
  • What superhero is their favourite? Spider-Pit!
  • Dates are great storytellers, always having something exciting or hilarious to recount about themselves or someone they met on an earlier date.
  • What do you call a date fruit that spends all their time reading books? A date-millionaire!
  • Why did the date visit a therapist? He or she had emotional problems!
  • “What an exciting victory!” exclaimed the date upon winning this honor.
  • How are date fruits paying for their college expenses? With an interest-bearing loan!
  • What can you call someone having an unpleasant day on a date? Grumpy!
  • Where should couples vacation together? In Pitts-burgh!
  • Why don’t more couples go mountain climbing together? Fear of falling down into an underground cave prevents it!
  • What do you call an unruly date fruit that always finds itself in trouble? A date-ger!
  • What exercise are dates most fond of doing together? They probably love Pittanica!
  • What did a date fruit say at the gym? “I’m here for my daily workout!”
  • What game should a date enjoy most? Hide and Seek!
  • Why don’t dates give speeches? Because they fear public speaking.
  • Dates are some of the greatest comedians around; they always know just when and where to deliver an “eye-opening” line!
  • Dates are always so generous, sharing their most precious memories.
  • Why was my date unwilling to play hide and seek? She didn’t want me chasing after her!
  • What do you call an annoying date fruit that keeps getting into mischief? A date-ger!

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Best Puns About Dates

  • What happens if two dates clash? A fight!
  • On Valentine’s Day, one date fruit exclaimed to another “You completely pitted my delicate shell!”
  • Dates are avid readers; one genre they particularly enjoy reading are romance novels with “date-ective” themes!
  • Dates are an expert at doing math – especially “date-culating!”
  • What do you call an indulgent date fruit that loves taking selfies? A date-mean!
  • What did she reply after such a long run? “I’m exhausted!”
  • What would you call a date fruit that’s always going missing? A “date fruit on the run!”
  • What do you call a date that always seems rushed and chaotic? A “quick date!”
  • What time of the day does a date favor most often? At dawn!
  • What do you call a date fruit that keeps losing its keys? A date-ger!
  • Pit Copperfield is often touted as being one of the favorite magicians among his or her dates!
  • What do you call someone who takes risks on dates? A “date-vil!”
  • Dates know how to party! They bring life and excitement into any gathering!
  • Why was my date in such a good mood? She had plenty of pep in her step!
  • What do you call someone with an outstanding sense of humor? A “hoot”.
  • What do you call a date fruit that keeps getting lost? A date fruit on the run!
  • Where would a date typically store his/her money? In an underground vault!
  • My attempt at making a date smoothie ended up as an epic fail!
  • Why did he go for therapy? Due to emotional baggage!
  • Why do dates make good spies? Because they provide excellent eyewitness accounts!
  • If a date fruit opened a bar, it would likely be known as The Pit Stop!
  • What movie would make an ideal date night experience? “Date Night!”
  • Dates are great listeners – not to mention attractive potential partners!
  • Why did the date win at boxing? Because their punch always hits home.
  • Why did the date form a band? They wanted to become “rock date” stars!
  • What can you call a date fruit that always arrives late? A date-line!
  • Dates are often eager to go on adventures together and are up for anything from road trips and overnight stays, to international adventures!
  • What do you call a date fruit that keeps misplacing its keys? A date-ger!
  • Why did the date visit the dentist? Because she had pit cavities!
  • Do you know which shampoo your date likes the best? ‘Pit & Shoulders!’
  • Why can’t my date resist dancing? The rhythm just drives them!
  • Why did the date fruit take a rest break? Perhaps they needed a timeout from being on display!
  • Why did the date apply for employment at the bank? They wanted to “date-deposit” some funds!
  • What would you call a date fruit that’s constantly reading books? A date-millionaire!
  • My date’s favorite music? Pit-hop!
  • What are the differences between date fruit and grapes when they reach ripeness? Grapes turn purple when fully mature while date fruits ripen when brown in colour.
  • What did the date fruit use to keep cool during its summer blossom? A pit fan!
  • Dates don’t make good secretaries! Their hands always get too dirty too soon!
  • What differentiates date fruit from pear? A pear turns green once ripened while date fruit matures to brown at maturity.
  • What do you call an irresistibly tempting date fruit that’s always getting into mischief? A date-ger!
  • Why did the date defeat the raisin? Because of their respective plans!
  • What would you call a date fruit that always arrives when promised? A prompt-date fruit!
  • What was their favorite nursery rhyme? “Pitty Pitty Bang Bang! “, said their date.
  • What dance move are most attractive dates likely to embrace? Surely salsa!
  • What would you call a date fruit that spends their days reading books? A date-millionaire!
  • Dates make excellent detectives; they always know how to “uncover” the truth.
  • What do you call an incorrigible date fruit that constantly causes problems? A date-ger!

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Hey, I am Chetan Kumar owner of Punss.com. I made this site to add humor to your life. I love to laugh and I am pretty sure you do too. So let's share some jokes, puns and funny nicknames. Let's make each second joyful.

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